If you don’t know by now, on Friday June 11, 2021 I celebrated the biggest day of my life…no it wasn’t my wedding day but honestly it did feel that way. I was officially called to the Bar of the Commonwealth of The Bahamas. Lots of people see the pretty pictures but don’t understand the struggles and tears faced to reach that moment. Social media shows the highlight reel and I often wonder if anyone struggles with things or if everything is just perfect all the time.
Originally, this day was supposed to take place last year but due to circumstances beyond my control, I had to wait until June. I was irritated, annoyed and frustrated because this day could not come quick enough. I started to question my worth, as if I’m only valuable with some sort of academic achievement. Well anyway, the lead up to this day really tried me because everything that could go wrong did go wrong, from my items coming all the way from England and something was missing from my package to my Presenter being unable to present me to the Bar and having to find someone else to do it at the last minute. Here are some of the lessons I learned in the lead up to my big day.
1 You are worthy– I spoke about this area briefly in my blog post Dealing with Academic Disappointments. I’m the type of person to do way too many things and then get overwhelmed mid way through but put on a brave face for everyone. Someone once asked me why I was doing so many things, if I was insecure. Honestly, at that time I was offended but in reality maybe a part of it was true. I always felt like I had to prove my worth. To make myself stand out amongst the crowd in law school I would join different societies to enhance my resumé’ and give me better chances at getting a job. While nothing is wrong with this, there were moments where I was just doing too much. Honestly, I was in a phase of my life where I felt like my worth was tied to my academic accomplishments. And here I was a few years later missing the point again. All I cared about was achieving this goal instead of realizing that even without a qualification I’m still worthy, loved, fearfully and wonderfully made by God.
2 Contentment– I am one of the most persistent people that you will ever meet. I followed up on my application almost every day, hoping that I would be lucky and there would finally be a date for my big day. I followed up so much that the ladies in the office knew my name. Unfortunately, every time I called, I was met with unpleasant news that there was no date set. I began to accept my fate and just deal with the fact that it’ll happen when it happens but I still did not experience the peace of true contentment. The song that really made me realize that I was not content in the season that I was in was Jireh-Maverick City Music. Let me tell you how that song wrecked me and exposed the fact that I was not content. Despite being miserable, I can say that as one of my housemates always used to say, it was for character building. The not so nice parts of my character were truly revealed. During my season of waiting, I took time to do things that would positively impact me and enhance other areas of my life. Check out the song Jireh below.
3 Timing– There’s something about timing. We always want things to happen in our time then God laughs and lets us know who is boss. While we’re rushing for something to happen, God is taking His time to perfect not just the thing we’re waiting on but to perfect us. In waiting, God prepares us for the moment by pruning us and exposing the parts of us that we need to work on. Nothing beats God’s timing. While my ceremony did not happen when I wanted it to, it happened when God wanted it to.
4 Favor– There’s something about God’s favor. We can’t really explain it but we know we have it. Before finishing bar school, I had a job. Despite things not going as planned and not getting called when I wanted to, God came through in ensuring that when the time came I would have a job. I am honestly so grateful for how things worked out. While things did not go the way I planned. God’s favor was all over my journey to the big day and everything worked out the way it was supposed to.
I still can’t believe the day actually came and it was everything I dreamed of and more!
Stay tuned for next week’s blog post where I’ll be sharing pictures from the Big Day!
What bar school related content would you like to see from me? Let me know in the comments!
Schar's Mind 