What do Your Words Say About You?

“I am beautiful, no matter what they say….Words can’t bring me down….” (If you didn’t start singing after you realized what song this was, are you even human? Lol). Christina Aguilera tried to empower us with her hit single Beautiful but let’s be honest, words do bring us down. In Junior High, I had many moments when I felt insecure because of the hurtful things that some people said to me. I know that it was harmless joking around but to that girl in the seventh grade who would go home and cry, it was embarrassing, humiliating and dreadful. I hate to admit it but truth be told, sometimes I was on the other end of the jokes and rumors. I don’t know whether I thought it would make me feel better about myself or what but it didn’t.

Have you ever heard of the saying “There is Power in the Tongue”? Some people associate this quote with speaking positive things over one’s life but it can also relate to what we say about and to others. Sometimes we do not fully appreciate the power of our words. Growing up in The Bahamas, it is often taught that we should learn to have thick skin and ‘stop catching feelings for nothing’. While it may be true that some petty issues do not require ‘feelings catching’, is it okay for the person who caught the feelings to be the only one who should consider how they handled the situation? Don’t get me wrong, it’s okay to make jokes but I can say the same thing to Jill and Jack and they will both react differently to the statement. This is why it is important to understand who you’re talking to before you say certain things because you never know how it may affect a person.

Some people associate bullying with actual physical violence. However, bullying can also relate to name calling and teasing. As stated earlier, different people may react differently to the same thing. While one person may be able to shrug off an insult, someone else may take it to heart and even consider harming themselves yet go to school acting normal and no one may ever realize that this person is hurting. If you have been a victim of harmful words, do not let someone’s misconceptions of you define who you are.

“What Susie says of Sally says more of Susie than of Sally.” The things that I say about others say more about me than it does about them. Our words reveal our character. At one point or another we all may have said something hurtful about someone. While sometimes no harm is intended with the mean things that we say, other times, there may be malicious intent which may come from a place of hurt or pain. If you have been the one dishing out harmful words with malicious intent, it’s important to acknowledge that maybe this stems from something deeper and to figure out what it is. Also, remember that it is never too late to start afresh and try to speak positivity into someone’s life.

Along with mean jokes, we also say unpleasant things to others in response to what they say to us, sometimes without even thinking about it as though it’s a reflex. Remember, “A soft answer turneth away wrath but grievous words stir up anger.” Proverbs 15:1. When you’re about to speak your mind in response to someone’s ignorance, pause for a moment, breathe (Remember our Mantra, Inhala Exhala) then recalibrate. Walk away if you have to but remember that every action does not require a reaction. As Serita Jakes said, “You can always outclass a person but you can never out-trash a person.” (Let that sink in).

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” This was the biggest lie that we said to ourselves as kids (You may be one of the thick skinned people so this may not apply to you). Whether we like it or not, words hurt but you have the ability to let your words empower or motivate others. You have the power to speak life over someone’s situation. We may never know what people are going through and how much our words can affect them.

Your words have power, what impact will you allow them to make in someone’s life today?